Your Little Secret
by HaveringFool
Summary: Jane's got Casey, her husband, at home, and Maura's got Angela at home, and Maura is completely disgusted with herself for letting her life turn into this, but she can't bring herself to break it off, even though she's slowly starting to hate Jane.


"Jane?" Maura calls from the door, as she enters the dingy hotel room. She sighs at the drabby curtains and the bad light. "Jane?"

"Maura? Where did you go?" Jane sleepily pats the empty bed, smiling, "Come lie with me…"

Maura sits on the edge of the bed, back turned away from Jane. She holds back a frustrated sigh. She holds back angry words and she holds back the thoughts that had played in her mind.

"Maura?" Jane softly calls as she wraps her arms around Maura.

Maura tenses. Jane takes her arms back.  
>Jane sits behind Maura, cross-legged, and smile lost.<p>

Shouts are heard overhead - thin ceilings, and thin walls; a cheap hide-out.

The pair says not a word.

Maura stands.  
>Jane moves to follow, but she remains seated instead.<p>

A shared sigh, echoes the sparsely furnished room.

"Jane," Maura turns to look at Jane, "I don't want to do_ this_ anymore."

Jane nods and manages a small, "okay."

Maura turns to go.

Jane takes hold of Maura's hand.

"Don't go…" Jane's voice is soft and she feels small.

Maura shuts her eyes and purses her lips, to stop the words from escaping. Maura tries to even her breathing; anger and hurt, boiling close to the brim.

"Maura, please, we can work this out. I'll get us a flat, a better place, a—"

"Don't you get it Jane?" Maura shouts and backs away from Jane.

"This _is_ cheap. It's not the place. It's not the place Jane! It's us. _We are_ cheap."

Maura holds up her hand, silencing Jane.

"I can't bear the thought of being without you Jane but, I _want _to be without you Jane. I want to be rid of you, your family and your _husband!"_ Maura almost spits out that vile word, "You have a husband and that makes me what? What Jane? Your—"

"Don't say it Maura," Jane pleads.

"I don't want to do this anymore Jane…" Maura loses the battle with her tears; they fall, warm down her face; stinging her eyes, and burning her cheeks.

Jane reaches to hold Maura to her.

Maura shakes her head and backs away further.

"I don't want to do this anymore, I don't want to," Maura manages through her sobs.

Jane wraps her arms around a resisting Maura.

Jane holds Maura close to her, not letting go despite being pushed away.  
>Jane keeps her arms around Maura, as Maura's tears soak through Jane's shirt.<br>Jane murmurs please, as she holds on tightly; fighting to hold onto Maura.

Maura eventually stops the fighting. Her legs feel light and her arms ache from the pounding.

Jane pulls Maura closer in. Jane rests her cheek against Maura's head, as Maura continues crying. Jane's own shirt now thoroughly drenched and Maura's hair is laced with tears.

"Please Maura, I don't want us to end," Jane whimpers into Maura's hair, with tears of her own, flowing too, still.

"I wish I chose Tommy and not you," Maura sobs against Jane's chest, "I wish I never told you that I love you."

"Ian never made me feel cheap, but you did, you do Jane. You do," Maura tries to pull away from Jane, but ends up crying against her still, "I go home and your mother is there, every day, marvelling at how well Casey turned out to be, with him helping out with the laundry and taking care of you," Maura sniffs," I hang on to every single insult or criticism that she ever has or will make of him," Maura breathes, "And constantly I try to show her that I measure up to him, that I can be better for you than him but Jane," Maura holds tighter onto Jane, "Jane you picked him. You married him, and I'm just your—"

"Don't say it Maura, please don't," Jane pleads as she rubs her hand against Maura's back, "Don't say it Maura. We're not…"

"We're cheating. We're cheaters Jane," Maura closes her eyes, focusing on the fabric of Jane's sodden shirt, "We are cheaters and I don't want to be a cheater anymore Jane…" Maura pulls away.

Jane's arms hang in the air.  
>They fall limp, Maura's no longer there.<p>

"We can't do this anymore Jane. I can't do _this _anymore," Maura wipes at the new onset of tears.

"Give me time Maura, I'll leave Casey, I'll leave Casey, and we'll be together Maura," Jane reaches out for Maura's hand.

Maura steps back and falls onto a chair. The chair creaks under her weight. Jane takes the chance and kneels before her.

"I'll leave Casey Maura," Jane pleads, taking both of Maura's hand in hers, "I'll leave Casey. I will."

"Please don't leave me Maura…" Jane whimpers, "Please…"

Maura looks to the ceiling, and back to Jane; taking a moment to stop her tears. "You married him Jane, because you love him," Maura takes back her hands, "I made the mistake of lying on that mattress with you," Maura keeps her voice even, "I made the mistake of lying on that mattress of which you and your husband now share," Maura pushes the chair back to stand, "You married him, because you love him Jane. Don't forget that. We got drunk that night and we started something that wasn't right," Maura straightens her top, "Every time ever since, was a mistake and we are cheaters Jane. I'm not your best friend anymore…I'm just—" Maura sighs, "I'm just your best friend turned mistress," the word stings, "I made the mistake Jane, and I won't make it again."

Maura walks past Jane, to the door and—

Jane runs and shuts it - the door; keeping Maura in.

Jane leans against the door, stopping Maura from leaving. Jane falls to the floor, legs weak and her head hurting. Words are lost on Jane, and she brings her hands to her hair as she leans against the door. A human barrier; Maura can't leave.

"Maura wait, please," Jane manages.

"I waited long enough Jane! Please!" Maura shouts; worried that her resolve might slowly crumble away, "Please Jane…let me leave." Maura kneels and pleads.

"You're wrong Maura, you're wrong. I don't love Casey," Jane breathes through her hands, "I love you Maura," Jane looks into Maura's eyes, "I love you."

Jane takes in a deep breath, "I thought I wasn't good enough for you Maura, I worried that you wouldn't feel the same and I said yes to him, because he asked and you never did," Jane looks down, "I told you about it and I thought you would stop me, but you never did and, I thought maybe you really didn't love me like I love you. That Ian was still the love of your life and so, I married Casey, thinking that I'll forget you, that I'll be over you, but Maura," Jane looks back up, "That night, with the wine and the mattress, it wasn't your mistake, it wasn't a mistake."

"It was the only right thing I've ever done," Jane takes Maura's hand, "I'm sorry Maura, I'm so sorry," a tear falls, "I didn't know how to say no to Casey then, I didn't know how to leave him and, I had you, I have you now, and it was all that mattered, all that matters and I didn't, it was all so perfect, that I…I didn't think that leaving Casey mattered."

Maura brings Jane into a hug.  
>Maura's hand running through Jane's hair, Maura's fingers weaving through Jane's unruly curls. But it does Jane, it does matter, Maura says to herself.<p>

"I'll leave him Maura, and you're better than him. Ma would be happy to have you Maura," Jane rests on Maura's shoulder, "I would be happy, I am happy to have you Maura," Jane presses her lips to Maura's hand, "I love you Maura."

"I love you too Jane," Maura presses her lips to Jane's palm, to Jane's scar, "All of you, and you're good enough for me Jane, even without the wine."

"Are you joking to ease the tension in the air Ms Isles?" Jane sits upright and smiles, cheeks tight from the dried tears. "And look Maura," Jane takes off her wedding ring, "I'm Ms Rizzoli again."

"It doesn't work like that Jane…" Maura looks back down, "Cheating is cheating. Maybe you should sleep with Casey again? For all the times that we slept together," Maura stops to do the math, "That would sum it up to—"

"Maura!" Jane shakes her head, a bewildered look. "No."

"But Jane—"

"I made the mistake, I cheated. I'll let Casey know. I'm not sleeping with anyone else, but you." Jane guides Maura to stand, "I miss our sleepovers Maura," Jane presses her lips to Maura's temple, "Just us lying together and talking."

"Me too Jane," Maura gently squeezes Jane's hand, "I miss them too."

"I know that the room is pretty bad Maura but, the bed's nice," Jane lights up.

"I have already paid the deposit for it…" Maura looks to the bed, "But nothing more Jane."

"Nothing more Maura," Jane tucks Maura under the duvet, and wraps her arms around Maura under a duvet, "We're not even touching, but you're everything I need anyway."

Maura looks at Jane's hand, with no ring.  
>Maura manages a moment, of Jane being Ms Rizzoli. "You are too Jane, you are too, Ms Rizzoli." Maura whispers.<p>

Jane nods, she heard her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Hi there, thank you, for the time~  
>Title is by, and summary description is the prompt by <span>argyle-s<span> and this happened under a gif set by and-isles and, just as a personal note: This story deals with cheating, which makes me uncomfortable so, I have to point out that - I don't like and would discourage cheating; and that's just my own opinion. I wrote this story then to sort of give it an ending, but, I really don't like cheating and so, the story ends thus as such.


End file.
